This girl is more easily done than said...
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Randomize
