She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
