somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
