Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
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