I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize