you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize