Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Randomize
