Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
