she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
