It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Randomize