i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
