hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
