It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
