It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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