I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
You brought string cheese to the strip club
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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