She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Randomize
