So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
