I need help removing her.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
