They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
