I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Less talking, more tequila
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
