I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
