thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
She bit a glass in half.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Randomize
