Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Randomize
