I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
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