two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
