i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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