Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
grandma shit on top of the toilet
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
