My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
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