And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
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