The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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