LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Randomize
