Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
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