Do you still have your period?
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Randomize
