First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
Randomize
