Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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