): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
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