dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
