do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
Randomize