i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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