Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
Randomize
