Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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