If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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