how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Randomize
