I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
