Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
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