That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
