just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
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