I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
somebody snuck up and got me drunk
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
