i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
I gave the guy a $20 tip on a $9 cab ride, he thought I was just bad at math but I was really just incredibly thankful to be alive and home.
I was like "don't worry, I'm a math major and you deserve the shit out of that 222% tip"
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
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