Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
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